


The Real Reason Woojin Left Stray Kids

by chenlebabyhands



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Bang Chan is Whipped, Bang Chan is a Sweetheart, Bottom Bang Chan, Character Death, Couch Sex, Cute Yang Jeongin | I.N, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff, Gay Sex, Grinding, Groping, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Lemon, M/M, Movie Night, News Media, One Shot, Paranormal, Please Don't Kill Me, Please Forgive me, Smut, Suicide, Suicide Notes, Top Woojin, chanaconda, dont @ me, i'm not okay, woochan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-25 12:21:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22155982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chenlebabyhands/pseuds/chenlebabyhands
Summary: It was very subtle at first. A faint frown or zoning out.Chan could tell when something was wrong with Woojin, but no matter how right he was, he was always denied.
Relationships: Bang Chan & Kim Woojin, Bang Chan/Kim Woojin
Comments: 9
Kudos: 62





	The Real Reason Woojin Left Stray Kids

**Author's Note:**

> I got inspired to write this at 3 am because of my friend in a Twitter group chat pffft
> 
> Mira: I'm so saddd I want to read something saddd  
> Me: brooo i gotchu, what ship ??  
> Mira: WOOCHAN WOOCHAN WOOCHAN WOOCHAN WOOCHAN  
> Me: I--  
> Mira: WOOCHAN  
> Me: okay omg I'll write u woochan O_O
> 
> this is also lowkey my way of coping with Woojin's absence  
> by making myself more sad about it  
> make it make sense
> 
> anygays
> 
> I hope you enjoy!! :)

It was very subtle at first. A faint frown or zoning out.  
Chan could tell when something was wrong with Woojin, but no matter how right he was, he was always denied.

..

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Chan asks when Woojin messes up his verse for the third time during practice. He frowns and looks him in the eyes.

“Woojin Hyung… This isn’t like you,” Jeongin whines.

Woojin blushes and quickly looks away. “I’m fine,” he lets out a hollow laugh. “Just tired.”

Chan doesn’t fully believe him, but he gives one last worried glance before he rewinds the backtrack to Woojin’s verse. The music plays and Woojin sings again, this time doing it perfectly. His voice is so beautiful. Like a siren, it lures you in. It’s as if you can listen to that voice for hours. 

Woojin earns a quick pat on the shoulder and a thumbs up from Changbin when he finishes. All of the members were centered around Woojin for his solo, but now they disperse as Felix goes forward and begins to rap. They quickly go into a V-like formation with Felix in the front, as he finishes his verse.

They all duck down as Chan goes in the middle of the formation and does his own part. 

Everything went smoothly after that. Everyone did their own thing when the song ended, every ounce of it being chaotic. Changbin ran to the corner of the practice room and back with his hands up and Jisung fell onto the floor. 

The practice for that day had come to a close and everyone made small talk while packing up their things. Woojin was the first to head out. Chan caught a glimpse of Woojin’s cheek, almost missing it. But he didn’t. There was a tear falling down the right side of his face and collecting at his chin. Chan blinked and before he could process anything, Woojin was already out the door.

..

The next morning, everyone was awake. Hyunjin was rubbing his tired eyes and Minho was putting his shoes on. They were all planning on going to their favourite cafe for brunch, but Chan was having second thoughts. There was one person missing. They all piled out of the door but Minho stopped, seeing Chan glued to the floor. 

“Aren’t you coming?” Minho cocked his head in confusion.

“You guys go along, I think I’m going to stay behind. I’m not feeling so well.”

Minho spared him a sympathetic smile.

“Alright, just take it easy, okay?”

Chan nodded and Minho gave him one last smile and a “take care” before running out the door to catch up with the others. A faint “Minho!” could be heard, followed by laughter.

Chan sighed and closed the door. He needed to check up on Woojin. But he didn’t want to just walk into his room unannounced, asking how things were. He wanted a reason.

.. 

The microwave went off and Chan retrieved his bowl from inside. He cursed at how hot it was and put it down quickly. He fanned his hands. Don’t microwave a glass bowl. He sighed, getting out a fork and mixing around some of the food. Fried orange chicken mixed with the rice, staining some of the grains orange. It may have been leftover Chinese, but any chicken is good chicken.

When he feels like the temperature of the food is equally distributed, Chan places the fork back in the bowl and (carefully) picks up the dish. He walks towards Woojin’s room and knocks on the door. There’s no response.

“Woojin-ah? I brought you… Err…” He looks down at the bowl. “Breakfast?”

Still no response.

“Woojin?” silence. “Okay, I’m coming in!”

Chan opens up the door and walks into his room. Woojin is inside, laying down on the bed, his back turned.

“Woojin?” Chan places down the bowl onto the nightstand and crawls onto the bed.

“Hey, wake up, sleepyhead,” Chan shakes his shoulder. “Woojin-ah?”

Woojin stirs and groans, waking up. Chan lets out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding. He continues to rub his shoulder until he’s awake.

“Mhmm… Chris…?” Woojin groans. “What time is it…?”

His eyelids fall shut again as he tries to go back to sleep. Chan looks over at the digital clock. 

“It’s 8:34 AM,” he says, rubbing his shoulder again.

“Mhmm… Too early…”

“I brought chicken.”

Woojin opens one of his eyes and darts up, seeing the bowl on his nightstand. Chan laughs and hands it to him.

He must have been starving because he doesn’t hesitate before shoving the food into his mouth.

“Woah, woah, slow down, you’re going to get a stomach ache--”

Woojin stabs another piece of chicken with his fork and stops. He looks up at Chan, cheeks full and still chewing, as he offers him a piece. Chan laughs and lets Woojin place the chicken into his mouth. Woojin smiles, his eyes forming into small crescents, and it makes Chan’s heart skip a beat.

“Wurr if eferyfone?” Woojin asks with a mouthful of rice.

“They’re out getting brunch.”

Woojin swallows.

“Oh…” He stares down at his empty bowl. “You should’ve gone with them, I’m sorry.”

Chan panics.

“No, no, no, don’t be!” Woojin looks up at him with a frown. “I want to be here,” he places a hand on his shoulder and smiles.

Woojin looks down and giggles. He smiles at Chan. 

“Thank you, Chris.”

It all feels so natural. Chan feels warm and his heart races whenever Woojin laughs, smiles, or touches him. He can’t help but fall for him.

But he can never know that.

They continue to talk until the other members come back with leftovers for them. Woojin’s ecstatic at the new supply of chicken-- with waffles this time. He shares the food with Chan as they all sit together and watch Friends.

..

Practice continues the next morning, but Woojin hasn’t shown up.

“Where’s Woojin? He should be here by now,” Seungmin looks around.

“I’m sure he’s just running late, he always has a busy schedule.”

Everyone looks at each other, unsure. 

They start practice without him.

Woojin never showed up.

..

It’s when Chan’s writing lyrics in his room that afternoon when he next sees Woojin. 

His back is turned to the door, continuing to scribble down thoughts and possible lyrics onto a sheet of notebook paper. He continues writing, even when he hears someone enter his room.

“Chris?”

Chan turns around to see Woojin closing the door behind him. 

“Hey,” Chan smiles. Woojin sits down on his bed and lays his hands over his lap. The atmosphere seems heavy. He can tell Woojin is only forcing a smile. “Is something wrong?” 

Woojin frowns. “Hyung, I have something I need to tell you. It’s been on my mind for a while.”

“Oh, okay… Um… What is it--”

“Please please don’t freak out! You’re the first person I’m coming to about this and it’s really really important--”

“I--”

“Promise you won’t freak out!”

Chan smiles. “I promise I won’t freak out.”

He gets up and sits next to Woojin on the bed, looking up at him with anxious eyes.

_Could this be what he thinks it is? Does Woojin feel the same way? No, he shouldn’t get excited.  
...But he is just a little._

Chan prepares himself as Woojin lets out a sigh.

“I want to leave the group.”

_What?_

Chan’s reality shatters. It feels like this is all a lucid dream. He must’ve heard him wrong.

Woojin continues to talk, but it sounds so distant and he can’t hear him over his own thoughts.

All of their memories shared together… Their training, highschool, performances, laughing, smiling, sharing secrets--  
Was it all for nothing? This can’t be. He doesn’t want it to all come to an end. 

“Chan? Are you okay?” Woojin asks, worried.

_No._

_I’m not okay._

_Please don’t leave me._

“Why…” Chan swallows. “H-How long have you been… Thinking about this…?” He internally curses himself for feeling his eyes water.

Woojin hugs himself.

“It’s always been on my mind… But… I think I’m going to go through with it now.”

Silence. It screams in his ears. He’s overcome by all of it as he lets the first tear drip down his cheek. He pulls Woojin towards him with his sweater and rests his head on his chest. Woojin wraps his arms around Chan as he hears him let out dry, painful sobs.

_Please don’t leave me._

..

Woojin decides to tell the rest of the members in the morning over breakfast. They all have different reactions, but they’re all filled with doubt and despair. 

The reality of the situation doesn’t sink in until he sees Woojin’s empty room. 

Chan sits at the end of Woojin’s bed and cries. He grips the edge of the mattress, scratching at the surface. His vision is blurry with tears when he notices it.

A teddy bear.

The one Chan gave to him.

On the floor.

..

News articles were inescapable. 

_Woojin Leaves Stray Kids_

_Thank You Kim Woojin_

_Why Did Woojin Leave Stray Kids?_

_Stray Kids Member Woojin is Leaving the Kpop Group_

_The Real Reason Woojin Left Stray Kids_

“How could they know…” Chan throws his phone onto the bed. “ _They weren’t even there!_ ”

His voice shakes as he lets out another sob.

_I miss you._

..

Woojin and Chan still wanted to keep in contact, so they continued to text each other.

 **Kangaroo** : let’s hang out today >:3

 **Teddy Bear** : Don’t come over.

 **Kangaroo** : noooo but I miss you, Hyung!!! ;3; pleaseeee :D

***read***

**Kangaroo** : I’m bringing you cheese over fried chicken and there is NOTHING you can do to stop me!!!! >:O <3 <3 <3 <3 xoxo

..

“Thank you, you too!” Chan waves to the waiter before leaving the restaurant with a styrofoam to-go box.

He opens up the lid, just a little, and smells the chicken. He hums and closes the container. 

Woojin always enjoyed chicken. They both loved it. But he especially loved it with cheese. Some of the other members questioned him, but Chan could tell he didn’t care.

Cheesy chicken.

_Woojin’s favourite meal._

..

_Chan exits the elevator and takes a right into a dim hallway, only slightly familiar with his surroundings._

_Ever since Woojin left, He’s been staying at a rented condo._

_He’s already visited Woojin here twice before. Both of them to just casually hang out, just like old times. Except for Woojin’s absence from the group and having to go to another city just to see him, it’s almost as if nothing had changed._

_He smiles and feels himself blush as he recalls the last time they spent time together, only one night ago…_

_Chan burst into Woojin’s apartment, already knowing it was left unlocked for him._

_“Chris!” Woojin smiles and pounces him with a hug._

_“Hi! Did you miss me?” he giggles._

_Woojin pulls back. “Only a little,” he pouts. His eyes move down to Chan’s hand. Or, what’s in it. “What’s that?”_

_So cute._

_“I brought some snacks!” Chan smiles as he holds up a plastic bag. Woojin sniffs the bag and Chan lightly pushes him away. “Close your eyes and open up your hands! No peeking, okay?”_

_“Okayyy,” Woojin smiles, scrunching his nose, as Chan retrieves the food from the bag and places it in his open hands. He opens one eye before quickly opening the other. “No way!” he looks at the pastry closer, inspects every angle. “Is this--”_

_“Bungeoppang!*” Chan finishes for him. He retrieves his own from the grocery bag and takes a bite. “Mmmm…” He eyes Woojin’s food, suggesting he takes a bite. He does._

_*Bungeoppang: a fish-shaped pastry filled with red bean paste; often sold at street stalls._

_“Wow!” Woojin says with a full mouth._

_“You were always talking about how you wanted to try it, so I thought I’d bring you some.”_

_Woojin giggles. “Thank you!”_

_.._

_They decided to go to a local boba joint. Well, it was Woojin’s idea. Chan had never been there, but Woojin said it was good, so he decided to go along with it._

_Woojin ordered a classic boba tea while Chan got a coconut flavoured tea with pineapple popping boba._

_Chan stares at the tapioca pearls flow through Woojin’s straw and into his mouth._

_“Mmmmf,” he smiles wide. “Sooo good!”_

_A thin, white stream of tea slips from the corner of Woojin’s lips and flows down his chin. He swipes at it with his index finger, picking all of it up. His mouth opens slightly as he places his finger inside and sucks on it. He releases his finger with a pop and another smile._

_Chan swallows. He picks up his tea and takes a sip. Multiple pieces of popping boba instantly reach his mouth and he crushes them with his molars. The small orbs pop, releasing sweet pineapple juice. “Wow,” Chan licks his lips. “That’s actually… Really good?”_

_“Told ya,” Woojin giggles, making Chan blush._

_They sit in comfortable silence, enjoying their tea and the warm sun shining through the skylight. Chan spreads out his hands flat on top of the table and enjoys how warm it feels in contrast to the cold tea. It's the simple things in life like this that make every moment so special. He wouldn’t change any of this for the world._

_They break out into a small and comfortable conversation before leaving the joint and walking back to Woojin’s condo. When they got home, Chan sprawled himself on the couch and Woojin got bread from the pantry. He made Chan get up and scoot over to make room when he came back to the couch._

_“Is that what you’re eating?” Chan squinted his eyes at the bread._

_“Yeah, it’s good,” he took a bite of a slice and handed another to Chan._

_He forces a smile and takes a bite. Woojin was right, the bread was good. He could tell it was from a bakery. Perhaps the one that was across the street from the boba joint. It had a thin and crispy crust while the inside was soft and crumbly. Chan must’ve shown his delight on his face because he earned another giggle from Woojin, who picked up a remote control from the coffee table at the side of the couch and turned on the TV._

_Chan watched as Woojin flipped through channels. He wanted to watch something on Netflix, but if he were to ask then he might as well be asking to get ramen and go. But maybe he’s just paranoid._

_“There’s nothing good,” Woojin groaned. His eyes lit up and he looked over at Chan. “Hey, what do you say to some Netflix?”_

_Sounds perfect._

_“Sounds perfect,” Chan smiles._

_They log in through Woojin’s Netflix account and Chan laughs at how his password is “ch1ken123.”_

_“Chicken 123, really?”_

_“Don’t judge me.”_

_They scroll through countless shows, stopping on one occasionally to debate about whether they should watch it. The verdict is always no, and Woojin continues flipping through. He leans his head back and rests it on top of the couch, staring at the ceiling. He doesn’t even look at the TV while scrolling, he knows Chan will tell him when to stop._

_“Stop!” Chan taps his arm._

_“What?” Woojin lifts his head up and looks at the screen._

_Chan points to a show under the “Popular on Netflix” section._

_Kitchen Nightmares._

_“Good taste.”_

_They go through several episodes, skipping over some that didn’t catch their interest. They laugh at how awful some of the food looks and the condition, cracking terrible jokes that no one else would find funny besides them. They laugh at Gordan Ramsay’s reactions to the dishes followed up by his insults and talk about how bad they must taste. It’s kind of ironic since they’re only eating bread and that’s not exactly gourmet, either._

_Time flies and when the room looks a lot darker than before, Chan realizes that nighttime had already come._

_“Hey, Woojin, do you want me to--”_

_He looks over and he can’t believe he hasn’t noticed--_

_Woojin fell fast asleep._

_And his head was resting on his shoulder._

_Chan’s breath hitches at the sight and he forces himself to breathe normally._

_A soft, blue-tinted moonlight shines through the windows and rests on the two. Chan swallows. He never gets chances like this to look at Woojin this close. He takes in every feature. Even when he’s asleep, his hair is swept perfectly over his forehead. His eyes follow his smooth jawline and sharp chin. They scan over his cute nose and plush lips. Chan feels the strong urge to kiss them, but he resists. His eyes trail from his lips, back to his chin, and then to his bare neck. He can’t help letting his eyes travel more and more down, darting his eyes back up when he realizes what he’s doing. He lets out a small exhale, feeling heat travel south in his body. He forces himself to look at his face instead. Just his face._

_Woojin’s hair shines under the moonlight, and that’s when he notices a stray strand of hair falling over his left eye._

_Without thinking, Chan delicately swipes away the strand and pushes it back with the rest of Woojin’s hair. He runs his fingers through Woojin’s bangs and pushes them back behind his ears. His palm hovers over his scalp before resting the tips of his fingers on the divide in his hair. His fingers trail down his hair, tracing its pattern and follows behind his ear. A moment of hesitation passes before his hand cups Woojin’s cheek. His face is so cold in comparison to Chan’s warm hands. He rubs light and soothing circles into his cheek. The act is so innocent, but Chan curses at himself as he feels more blood rush south._

_Woojin opens his eyes, making Chan jump back and dart his hands over his lap, hoping Woojin didn’t notice anything. But he knows he’s an open book for him._

_“Chris? What…” Woojin’s eyes rest on Chan’s hands._

_“Oh, hi, you can go back to sleep now, I was just leaving,” Chan laughs awkwardly and gets up as quick as he can, turning his back to Woojin before he can notice anything._

_He grabs Chan’s hand and pulls him back onto the couch, surprising him. He feels his face go red and instantly puts his hands over his lap again and gulps. He awkwardly switches his position, sitting criss-cross facing Woojin._

_“What--”_

_“Chris,” Woojin’s voice lowers._

_Chan looks away._

_“Chris,” he sounds demanding. “Look at me.”_

_Chan flinches slightly and slowly looks back towards him. Woojin takes his time looking him up and down before finally making eye contact. Chan feels himself panic internally._

_“Do you mind explaining,” Woojin lifts Chan’s hands away from his lap and gestures to the bulge growing in his pants. “...This?”_

_“I--” Chan looks away again._

_“And what were you doing with your hand on my face?” Woojin’s hand lightly pushes the side of Chan’s face, forcing him to look into his eyes again._

_“I wasn’t, well I was, but--”_

_Woojin leans in, their bodies a hair’s length from each other. He rests his hand on one side of the other boy, while the other is gripping onto the armrest behind Chan._

_“Is this,” Woojin moves his hand to Chan’s crotch, ghosting over it before cupping his bulge and running his thumb over it. “...Because of me?”_

_Chan lets out a quiet moan at the contact and looks away, cursing himself internally as he feels more and more heat rush south. Woojin forces Chan’s face to look at his again._

_Chan can already tell how wrecked he must look._

_“Tell me,” Woojin squeezes his hand, earning another moan from the other._

_“Y-Yes,” Chan gasps. “I’m so sorry, I--”_

_Woojin leans forward a few inches and closes the distance between them, his plush lips connecting with Chan’s, who lets out another moan._

_Woojin pulls back, looking down at Chan with dark eyes. He can see the lust in them. A want-- no, a NEED in them._

_And something else he can’t put a name to._

_He looks back and forth between both of Woojin’s eyes, panting slightly. He looks down at Woojin’s hand on his erection, and then back up. Without resisting this time, He pulls him forward by his shirt, connecting their lips again._

_Woojin softly flicks his tongue against the underside of Chan’s lower lip. He lets himself widen the kiss, allowing Woojin to slip his tongue into his mouth. They chase after the taste of each other's mouth and Chan wraps his lips around Woojin’s tongue before letting it back into his mouth. This time Chan pulls away._

_“God, Woojin…” he pants, resting their foreheads together. He looks him back in the eyes. “You’re so… wow.”_

_Woojin giggles. His fingers rub back and forth onto Chan, who’s completely hard now. “I’ve always wanted to do this.”_

_Did Chan hear him right?_

_“What…?”_

_“I’ve always wanted to do this,” he repeated. “I’ve always wanted you.”_

_“Does that mean you like me back?” Chan feels his eyes widen._

_Woojin’s hand stops moving._

_“Like you back?” his face pulls back a little and looks back and forth between Chan’s eyes as if he misheard him._

_Chan inhales._

_“I like you, I…” he looks into Woojin’s eyes. “I always have.”_

_“I like you, too.”_

_Woojin smiles and Chan doesn’t realize he’s crying until he feels a hand cup his face and a thumb wipe away his stream of tears under his left eye. Woojin leans in and kisses Chan again._

_It all feels so… Natural. So right. Like this was meant to happen. Chan doesn’t realize how much he’s been holding back and kisses Woojin roughly, grabbing the collar of his shirt with his free hand and tugging him forward to deepen the kiss. Woojin groans and Chan feels a hand on his pants again._

_As the kiss gets deeper, Woojin’s hands move to Chan’s hair. Feeling the loss of contact where he needs it the most, Chan pushes the other’s waist down and grinds up onto him. They both groan, the friction sending waves of pleasure to both of them. Chan can tell that he’s hard now, too, which only makes him grind rougher._

_“Christopher please,” Woojin moans. He takes his hand away from his hair and moves it to Chan’s waist, pushing him flat against the cushion. Before Chan can protest, his hands ghost over his crotch before fluttering the waist of his pants, giving it a slight tug. “Can I?”_

_“Fuck, yes,” he wraps his arms around Woojin and pushes him impossibly closer, until they’re almost laying on top of each other. “Please.”_

_Woojin smiles and they connect with a kiss again as his hands travel down Chan’s V-line and grips at his hard, leaking member._

Chan stops in the middle of the hallway to stretch one of his legs. It’s still hard to walk, but that’s no surprise. He would be annoyed by it, but he doesn’t mind-- it’s because of Woojin.

He hums a random tune and swings the to-go box back and forth between his hands. When he reaches Woojin’s apartment, he can’t help but smile and feel butterflies tingling at his stomach. 

He reaches for the door handle and gives it a twist.

It’s locked.

“Did he forget to unlock it?” Chan laughs to himself and retrieves a spare key that Woojin gave to him in case he ever got locked out. “Here we go.”

He slides the key into the lock, twists it, and pushes open the door. 

Woojin isn’t in the living room to greet him, which is expected since he didn’t hear the knocking. When he doesn’t see him in the kitchen, he walks over to Woojin’s room and stands outside of the door. His hand touches the doorknob, but he doesn’t open the door. He withdraws his hand. Something feels… Strange. Like there’s a presence behind the door.

_“It’s just your imagination,” Woojin laughs. He spreads himself on the bed and makes snow angels on top of the freshly cleaned sheets._

_“Are you sure your apartment isn’t haunted?” Chan nervously fidgets with his hands._

_“You keep saying it feels off… In what way?” Woojin sits up and looks at Chan, who points to the ceiling fan. The fan has nothing under it, leaving over 8 feet of space between it and the floor. “My fan? What about it?”_

_“I don’t know, I…” he takes a small step back. “It’s weird.”_

_“It’s okay to say it looks ugly--”_

_“No, it’s not that,” Chan says, sounding hesitant. “I can feel… A presence near it.”_

_Woojin looks up at his fan. “What do you mean? Where?”_

_“Under it,” Chan forces out. “It feels like someone’s under it.”_

Chan takes a deep breath and decides to knock on the door instead.

Knock. Knock.

“Woojin?”

Knock. Knock.

“Did you fall asleep again?”

Knock. Knock. Knock.

“Can I come in? I brought you food.”

No response. Only silence. 

He can still sense a presence behind a door.

Everything is screaming at him to not go in.

He ignores it and gives a final warning before swinging the door open.

“Wooji--”

Chan drops the to-go box on the floor, its contents spilling everywhere onto the clean carpet.

He shouldn’t have ignored it.

Chan looks up at Woojin.

He watches Woojin’s body slightly swing side to side.

He looks at his head, lowered and facing the ground.

He looks at his eyes, dull and staring at the floor.

He looks at his neck.

He looks at the rope that connects it to the ceiling fan.

He looks at the chair lying on its side on the floor.

He looks at the folded piece of paper sticking out of one of his pockets.

He looks at his shoes; off and lined up neatly below his feet.

Chan screams.

_“Are you sure you’re okay?”_

He puts the chair back up on its feet and places it under Woojin.

_“Woojin Hyung… This isn’t like you.”_

He gets on top of the chair and stands up.

_“I’m fine. Just a little tired.”_

He puts Woojin’s legs on top of his shoulders and lifts him.

_“Thank you, Chris.”_

He holds one hand over Woojin’s legs and reaches the other behind his neck, trying to unfasten the noose.

_“Where’s Woojin? He should be here by now.”_

He finds the knot and manages to untie it.

_“I’m sure he’s just running late, he has a busy schedule.”_

Woojin’s body falls forward and Chan keeps it steady while getting down from the chair.

_“Promise you won’t freak out!”_

He kicks the chair aside and places the body on the floor.

_“I promise I won’t freak out.”_

Woojin isn’t breathing.

_“I want to leave the group.”_

CPR. 

_“It’s always been on my mind… But… I think I’m going to go through with it now.”_

30 chest compressions. One rescue breath.

_I’m not okay._

Chan tilts Woojin’s head up, plugs his nose, and puts his mouth over his.

_Please don’t leave me._

Woojin isn’t waking up.

_“Don’t come over.”_

2 more rescue breaths. Nothing.

_Thank You, Woojin._

“Wake up, goddammit,” Chan sobs.

_Stray Kids Member Woojin is Leaving the Kpop Group._

“ **WAKE UP, PLEASE** ,” he hugs his lifeless body and sobs into his shirt.

_The Real Reason Woojin Left Stray Kids._

“WHY?” Chan screams. He doesn’t stop asking. “WHY?”

Tears fall from his face and land onto Woojin’s cheeks. Chan chokes and closes Woojin’s blank and lifeless eyes. He hugs his cold and heavy body, screaming and letting out dry sobs.

The folded piece of paper slips out from Woojin’s pocket and onto the floor.

..

_I’m sorry. That’s all I have to say. That’s all I can say. Why can’t I do anything right? Every second of every day that passes is a living hell. I don’t want to try anymore. I’m too weak for that, anyways. I know you’re reading this, Chris. I’m sorry for what you had to see.  
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. My only purpose is to disappoint. To fail. To scar. I’m sorry. I’ve always known this, and I feel, deep down, that others knew it, too. I love you. I love you so much. That’s why I’m doing what’s best. I have to die so that I don’t hurt you or anyone else. I love you so much that I want to die. I knew that I had to erase myself from this world and take my own breath away. That’s why I had to start with the most important thing to me; Stray Kids. I needed to leave and terminate my contract before terminating myself. I’ve lost hope. Things may get better, but they always go back to worse. It’s always my fault. I pretend to laugh. I pretend to smile. But inside, I feel nothing. I feel so empty, my chest feels so heavy and it feels like the air is passing through a gaping hole in my stomach. I’m too weak to fix myself. I’m too weak to ever be fixed. I’m too weak to keep trying. I’m sorry. Please tell me I did well._

_Love, Woojin._

**Author's Note:**

> let me know what you think!  
> twitter: https://twitter.com/chenlebabyhands


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